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Sermon highlights from Relationship Reset Week 1. Sermon by Pastor Mike Adkins; notes compiled by Dan O’Toole.

Big Idea:

  • “You can win a person or an argument. You can’t do both.”

Week 1 Main Scripture:

  • Colossians 2:2-8

Paul’s Goals For the Colossian Church

  1. Be Encouraged in Heart
  2. United in Love

At the time, false teaching had infiltrated the church in Colossians, and Paul sought to correct the Church to prevent them from being led away from Jesus and the Church. His primary approach was to lead with encouragement for the Colossians because he understood that they needed a more gentle approach, whereas, Paul could be more forward and challenging with the Corinthian Church. (1 Corinthians 9:20-22)

Communicating with Different People

  • You have to become a student of the people in your life. This requires growing in EQ, not just a higher IQ.
  • The goal of Biblical teaching is to know and treasure Jesus more.
  • The goal of communicating is to help people feel heard.
  • In order to be heard, you have to communicate with different kinds of people in a way that they hear it, not in the way you want to say it. Use language, terms, and illustrations they can understand. If they can’t understand it, they won’t be impacted by it.
  • How can we study the people in our lives so we know how to share the Gospel with them?

Big Idea: You Can Win a Person or an Argument. You Can’t Do Both.

If you win the person, they’ll be open to your argument down the road. Everyone needs to know you have their back before they’re willing to open their heart.

Important Values in Our Relationships

  • Straight-talk
  • Forgiveness
  • Loyalty
  • Faith
  • Constancy
  • Communication
  • Respect
  • Trust
  • Appreciation
  • Openness
  • Counsel
  • Carefulness
  • Morals

United in Love

We are woven together, not by common interest, but by Jesus. Interests fade. Governments and politicians come and go. Empires rise and fall. But God’s Word and his kingdom last forever.

The Church should be the center of a Christian’s life. Not an add-on or once-a-month event. It’s the very organizational system of your life that orients your life around Christ, who is the center of the Church.

How to Solve Conflict

When we have a problem or disagreement with someone, we should go to Jesus first. Then we go to the other person. Filtering everything you say and do through Jesus changes how you respond to the people in your life.

Not only can God change how you view the other person, but he can also change how you view yourself in the conflict. The Holy Spirit can reveal ways in which you may have contributed to a portion of the problem, which allows you to ask the other person for forgiveness. Your humility can awaken humility in others and provide the common ground for working together for a better solution.

The Fullness of Wisdom & Knowledge in Christ vs. The Emptiness of Fine-Sounding Arguments

According to Paul (Colossians 2:2-3), one of the ways you grow to be more like Christ is to focus on the fullness of the character and nature of God. Better wisdom and better knowledge always lead to a better life. Jesus’ forgiveness and grace are the path to healing in this life.

The more you grow in understanding the Word of God, the more confident you will be in discerning the emptiness of arguments and worldly wisdom that sound great on the surface but ultimately can’t deliver on the promises they set up.

Fine-sounding arguments will always lead you away from the church and then away from Jesus.

Don’t just look at the outside. Measure the inside of the argument.

What is Discipline?

Discipline is saying no to something good so you can say yes to something better down the road.

Continue to live your life in Christ just as you did when you first received him. Be conscious and intentional about living with Jesus and other believers.

Rooted in Jesus = Knowing who you are in Jesus and knowing what God says about you.

Catch up or rewatch the full messages from our Relationship Reset series here.

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